Saturday, November 3, 2007

Beans And Weenies

Princess and I went to the Y today to swim and there we were witness to a horrible tragedy, a crime against nature and an assault on our eyeballs. An old, old, old man and a younger woman were already in the pool. I first noticed her in the locker room; she was wearing a pair of sweat pants with one leg pushed up to her knee and the other almost to the floor. She stalked through the locker room and, I am not trying to be mean but, I noticed her open, slack jaw and thought she was looking for the person she came with because it was obvious that she did not drive--she was mentally handicapped, to use the PC term. That did not bother me until I saw her in the pool with the old man. I have no problem with 2 consenting adults doing what they want as long as they are not hurting anyone, and I could even accept that she was about 1/2 his age and he didn't have any teeth. But I cannot accept the fact that he was wearing the tiniest pair of nylon panties as a swimming suit. A pair so thin and tiny that gray hair was crowding out the sides and every detail of his beans and weenies was on display. And I mean beans and weenies, the kind that would come in a very small can. When he got out of the pool and Princess finally noticed what he was using as a swimsuit she looked at me in surprise and whispered, "That's gross!" I couldn't agree more.

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