Sunday, December 23, 2007

Darn This Fatigue!

I have to say, without a doubt in my mind, that this fatigue is the worst part of MS for me. I barely get rested up from Thanksgiving and Christmas is here. I can take a lot of the other problems that come in this lovely Multiple Sclerosis gag-gift box, but the fatigue irritates me more than all of them combined. I am as tired as someone 3 times my age and I get so sick of having to rest all the time. I miss the old days of being able to go all day and read half the night. Now I am in bed by 9 and lucky to get a half hour of reading in. We have one kid now (temporarily until her parents get in a better place) and sometimes I feel guilty for not having more energy for her. But then she buries me under a mountain of words and I realize that all she really wants is to flap her jaws and have somebody listen--that and play a few board games with her. I can take my messed up vision and itchy numb spots, but I really really wish I wasn't so tired. I take Amantadine, and that helps. I tried Provigil and HATED it. I felt like I should have snorted it or smoked it, it made me clench my jaw and want to chain smoke--not exactly the "awake" I am looking for. But the best thing yet has been taking the recommended rests, speaking of which, I have a hot date with my couch. Merry Holidays, my fellow afflicted inhabitants of this planet. Here's hoping that next year is (at least) not as bad as any past year has been, and really what more can you ask for?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

yes, i am tired of saying, "i'm tired of being tired." my neuro gave me ritalin (speed) but i can't see taking speed during the day, and then ambien to sleep.